Thursday, July 24, 2003

Should trust also be included in the 'formula' for "depth of relationship"? Transparency + vulnerability + dialogue + trust. If we define it as such, I don't think it's a possibility within the context of a church fellowship- especially a large one. Even with small groups, I haven't seen much deep relating. What is one supposed to do? You can't exactly say, "hey people...please start deeply relating with each other? Take off your masks....overcome your fears." I know people desire it, but how does it happen?

Would you say that deep relating occurs outside of fellowship? That it is in part a function of context? For example, deep relating would occur if there are fewer people in a more intimate setting more conducive to sharing. I also think that deep relationships scare some people. A person shares too much, and the rest of the group feels a little uneasy. They think, "Why didn't this person share this privately, rather than corporately?"

You're definitely not the "stereotypical" extrovert. :) It's interesting to note that most stereotypical extroverts aren't deep relaters. It's the otter versus retriever (Trent & Smalley's Two Sides of Love) dichotomy although I know it could happen.